Why I am Not Currently a Useful Pooka

I've been feeling awful lately. Constantly exhausted and fatigued, everything aches, I'm shaky, my head hurts ...

Turns out my blood pressure meds aren't working. When I went in today to the doctor, I got the OMFGBBQ stare. My BP, ON meds, was 154/114. They did a blood draw to check kidney and liver function, and surprisingly, everything was Perfectly Normal. At least I'm not killing myself with all the pain meds. It's just everything else that's trying to kill me.

I get back from the doctor today, to find out that a dear friend has finally lost her battle with cancer.

There's other really unpleasant stresses going on that aren't helping with my miserable health.

Darnit, I need a hug. *SIGH*.

So, I finally DO get a new diagnosis -- not a surprise, considering that every time I see a doc, they tell me something else is wrong with me. This one, though, was a relief.

Vasovagal syncope. A new diagnosis for my lengthy list, but at least it means I'm not having regular mild heart attacks -- I'm just screwed up in another totally new way, yay me.

(Note: "Syncope is usually preceded by at least a few seconds of symptoms that may consist of visual disturbances, buzzing in the ears, lightheadedness, sweating, nausea, or other symptoms. Individuals who have had syncopal episodes usually have an excellent idea of what prodromal symptoms to expect. It is important to recognize these symptoms, because if you do, syncope can be averted virtually 100% of the time by lying down and elevating your legs. If instead, you choose to fight the episode, you're likely to pass out in the frozen foods section, and the store manager will insist (for well-founded legal reasons) on shipping you to the E.R. in an ambulance – where you'll be subjected to a battery of unnecessary tests and probably an overnight stay in the hospital." -- amen. At least I'm used to this happening, and know how to keep me from passing out in the middle of a place, like I almost did Sunday night when I had another attack. Sheesh.)

My BP meds were upped again, just to be sure as well. I go back in two weeks to check my BP with the new meds, and go through a whole fasting physical and some massive amounts of bloodwork to narrow down the list of why I'm constantly run into the ground.

I'm tired of this shit. Can I go home yet?