Veni, Vidi, Ventus --
The randomly chaotic and crafty scribblings of a deranged, wannabe artist allowed too many colours in her Crayon box.

Surgeon General's Warning: Some content of "From Pooka's Crayon" may not be suitable for: work, blue-haired little old ladies, the politically-correct, rabid moonbats, uptight mothers, priests, chronic idiots, insurance claims agents, Democrats, children, small furry quadropeds from Alpha Centauri, or your sanity.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

And now for something completely similar

I'm sure I'm starting to sound like a broken record, but at least for now the playback is without all the nasty scratchy sounds.

Had my follow-up appointment with the pain clinic. Unfortunately, my COBRA'd insurance won't pay for PT with that clinic, but they will pay for it elsewhere, so as soon as things settle down a bit with DG's new job, I'll be starting 'occupational therapy' instead of straight old boring PT.

They're also setting me up for biofeedback and meditation to try and help control my response to pain surges, so that I can THINK my way to lower blood pressure and less agony. Taking into account what I've seen about Buddhist monks being able to totally control their bodies through thought -- even body temperature -- it's certainly possible to do it.

Considering the pain psychologist's commentary about me, I believe that to be entirely possible in my case. He said that I was already in the proper mindset for pain management, at a point that he said he usually doesn't see in patients until they've been coming to the clinic for months, so I'm already ahead of the game. Impressed him several times, the weight loss totally blew his mind, and convinced him even more that I was going to be a successful patient. Shiny.

The horrible brain spikes are still absent. This is just amazing, I feel like a totally different person at this point. Sure, I still have normal pain, and the burning throbbing from the RSD, but it's all tolerable pain that I'm used to by now. So long as my head isn't exploding, I can handle just about anything. Still get the dull headaches from the Chiari, but they're tolerable.

And I'm FUNCTIONAL again. I've been out of the house more often since the nerve block than I had in the year before that point. I've totally torn apart and reorganized my office space. Ditto to the bedroom, and not just my side of it, but have most of the rest of it under something resembling control.

It helps the mindset, with everything going on, to see at least SOME sign of organization and control. I may not be able to control everything, but I can control my personal space and sometimes, that's all that matters.

I have a curling iron now for my hair, which has actually been used. My way-too-old makeup has been tossed out, the remainder reorganized, and I actually wear it from time to time. I wear nailpolish again, even though I have to keep my nails ridiculously short because of the way they curve under.

Been reading like a fiend as well. Lots of quantum physics, forensic science (pathology, psychology, crime scene), epidemiology. While my mind still isn't as reliable as it was years ago, without the intense pain it's easier to concentrate and pay attention.

The Things have finally gone back to school, which is an inordinate amount of relief to stress. Kids were starting to drive me screaming up the walls bugnuts insane this summer. They seem to be adjusting pretty well, with few dramatic angsty moments (so far, but you know how teens can be).

"It's life, Jim, but not as we know it."

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