Veni, Vidi, Ventus --
The randomly chaotic and crafty scribblings of a deranged, wannabe artist allowed too many colours in her Crayon box.

Surgeon General's Warning: Some content of "From Pooka's Crayon" may not be suitable for: work, blue-haired little old ladies, the politically-correct, rabid moonbats, uptight mothers, priests, chronic idiots, insurance claims agents, Democrats, children, small furry quadropeds from Alpha Centauri, or your sanity.

Monday, September 05, 2005

Why Parents go Grey

T2: Daddy, do you want a state?
DG: Say what?
T2: Do you want a state?
DG: What kind of state?
T2: When I take over the world. Do you want a state, or would you prefer a country, or a planet?
DG: Well, if you take over the world, that's only one planet, so I can't have one of my own.
T2: Well, I'm not stopping there, I'm planning on taking over the entire Milky Way.

She has a notebook, wherein three full pages are dedicated to who gets what portion of the planet when Little Miss Empress takes it over. She hasn't quite started on the rest of the solar system yet.

T2: Mama, you want a state?
Me: A STATE? That's all I get, a lousy state? You offered DADDY that much.
T2: (snorts, sounding SO like me) You get more than him, cuz you're better, Mama.

I held out for several countries, including joint rule of a few, and collected several states in the process.

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Found in 8 year-old Thing 2's schoolwork (posted verbatim, spelling and all).

"We are learning about bugs. So Mrs. Wagner (ed. note: her teacher) brot a bee. It was died so we did not worie. It started to rain wene a strok of lightening and the bee was alive. We were scared, so Mrs. Wagner killed the bee so we did not worie aney more."

Apparently zombie thoughts begin early around our house.

So do thoughts of taking over the world and acquiring minions.

"One day a bunny named Mr. Bunbuns lived in a forest he wanted to tak over the world becuse they made Mr. Bunbuns mad so he need some help. So he hoped around to look for help. He sees some friends and they sadly say yes to help take over the world. Mr. Bunbuns made the friends minions to take over the world. And the world came to an end. Becuse he take over the world."

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Another one during "family time".

DG: (as an aside) Pooks, watch this.
DG: Hey T1, get out of our room now, mommy and daddy want to have sex.
T1: AAAUUUUGGGGHHHHHH! Nasty! That's just gross!
Me: Gee T1, how do you think you were made?
T2: Huh? You mean you guys humped or something to make her?
DG and Me: ::thud, laughing like idiots::

2 comments:

Mike said...

Has T2 read the Evil Overlord list? It's linked on my blogs.

Karen said...

Oh I love those stories. They sound so familiar. You know what would be scary? If our two kids decided to get together and take over the world. (You know, it's probably a good thing Canada and Texas are so far apart.)